Tuesday, December 15, 2015

IT companies to train fresh graduates in jargons instead of technology for better future

Bangalore: In a revolutionary step taken by a group of mid-level IT firms, newly recruited graduates will now undergo a rigorous training in jargon usage instead of new technology.

Fresh trainees could soon be attending a jargon session

Fresh trainees could soon be attending a jargon session

Speaking to Faking News, representative of a member company said, “Stuffing technology into fresh minds has never reaped benefits for the company but word play surely has. Among multiple factors, how you express, what you talk, and the timing of words are critical when it comes to impressing clients and bagging further projects.”

Nirvanesh, one of the representatives of this group, seemed like an authentic rock fan with a long goatee. He said, “There’s a lot up there but don’t be scared, who needs actions when you’ve got words. The great Kurt Cobain said it right during his time and it is proving to be true in case of an IT company like ours, for that matter, the whole conglomerate.”

“First of all, learning jargons is important, technology ka kya hai! Bachche apne aap seekh lenge, sab B.Tech kar chuke hain, ek din mein deliver karna tho inke baayen haath ka khel hai,” said one representative who chose to speak in his mother tongue.

“Let me check that very quickly; I’ll get back to you shortly;let me know in case of concerns; hope you’re good. This is a 4-point formula for success,” said a budding lead who was sent as a delegate in the absence of the company’s director.

Young IT recruits too were of the opinion that the chances of getting a girl went higher if you could blurt out a few tech jargons. “Never heard of a girl being impressed with a guy’s coding skills. But I know a few girls who have a thing for guys who know jargon,” said a junior level programmer.

As per our reliable sources, the top notch publishers have taken a note of this meeting and its unbelievably fresh approach towards doing business. One such book currently under publication is “Pay your bills with jargons” by Bakwant Feknitkar.

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