Thursday, December 31, 2015

After getting no invitations to New Year Parties, man to spam everyone’s timeline with ‘I support free basics’ propaganda

Bangalore: In shocking news a local techie Mr Kirti Azadhind(no resemblance to anyone living or dead) who got no invitations to New Year parties has decided to exalt revenge on everyone by spamming their Facebook timelines with ‘I support free basics propaganda’.

Beware of the Free Basics spammer

Beware of the Free Basics spammer

This propaganda which is currently cluttering everyone’s notification bar is now all set to infect everyone’s timeline if Kirti gets his way. This has sent all of Kirti’s acquaintances into a state of emergency with many scrambling to send him last moment invites with one of his uncle even ready to provide airfare so that he can attend a party in Delhi but Kirti is not ready to budge.

We spoke to Kirti, “Well it was so insulting to me when everyone in office was discussing their New Year plans and were asking me the same while barely being able to hold back a snigger. Even all the 15 girls who have friendzoned me didn’t hold back from making fun of me. Then I decided to take the mother of all revenges on those F******* by spamming their timeline with Free Basics propaganda. I have even setup a backup of 2 similar minded individuals if someone decides to take me out. But why is everyone so afraid of my threats, the timeline come new year would still be cluttered with shit like, ‘Glorious future blooms in all our hearts, happy new year’ , ‘Hope all your hopes and aspirations get fulfilled and all troubles go away, happy new year’ , ‘Dark cloud parts ways and divine light shines upon us this new year, happy new year’.”

Kirti continued with many more examples but our reporter decided to censor them in larger public interest.

Facebook is now mulling to withdraw the Free Basics propaganda altogether after they feel Kirti’s campaign might create a rippling effect prompting others to follow suit resulting in people not using Facebook altogether.

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