Tuesday, June 9, 2015

5 more things after Surya Namaskar which Muslim bodies have found to be anti-Islamic, and seek exemption from

After labeling Surya Namskar as against Islam, several Muslim bodies are now seeking exemption against few other things which they claim to be anti-islamic. “We think the time is ripe is to now protest and ask for as many exemptions that we can,” said an executive council member of All India Muslim Personal Law Board (AIMPLB).

Faking News contacted these bodies to find out what these things are:

Clapping: Muslim bodies have demanded that Muslims be exempted from clapping during events in schools, colleges, cricket matches etc as for clapping they have to join their hands and for a fraction of a second they are in namaskar position, which goes against the tenets of Islam.

“We Muslims don’t fold hands for anybody and even while praying, our hands form a crescent shape, so it hurts our sentiments besides hurting the palms,” argued a Maulana.

Muslims organizing peaceful protests like AAP across India.

Muslims organizing peaceful protests like AAP across India.

Tying shoe laces: “Everybody knows that Muslims bow down only in front of Allah, so this act of making us bow down to tie our shoe laces is completely communal. Modi govt should either ban shoes, so that young Muslims are not tempted or provide a non-Muslim helper for every Muslim who can bow down to tie their shoe laces,” demanded head of Tasme-Ul-Dawa.

Peeing: Again while peeing, Muslim bodies argue that men have to bow down. “Muslim men shouldn’t be forced to pee while standing, but should have facilities in public toilets where they can sit and pee without having to compromise on their beliefs,” said AIMPLB member Kamaal Farooqui.

Winters: Yes, you read it right. Muslim bodies claim that during winters there is an irresistible urge among Muslims to rub their hands to generate warmth, which in turn gets them into a position where it seems they are praying with folded hands to those in front of them, at that particular moment.

“We seek exemption from winter weather in localities where Muslims reside or demand we be shifted to warmer places,” said Maulana Wali Rahmani.

Mamohan Singh:  Muslims bodies claim that appearance of Manmohan Singh on TV is against their beliefs as they are forced to sit in front of an idol for too long, which presents a huge risk of them committing idolatry, which is haram in Islam. “There isn’t much difference between an idol and Manmoahn Singh. Both don’t speak and move,” argued a member of AIMPLB.

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