Thursday, May 7, 2015

Salman’s heart declared gold reserve by RBI

Mumbai. Taking notice of the growing number of Salman Khan’s fans and Bollywood celebs claiming that the actor has a heart of pure gold, Reserve Bank of India today declared actor’s heart as an official Gold reserve.

The decision was taken after it was found that Salman fans and film fraternity had only one thing to say in Salman’s defense after he was convicted for the hit and run case by sessions court yesterday.

“Going through the tweets and Facebook status of these people, we found ‘Salman having a heart of gold’ the one of the most common update, second only to having prayers and thoughts with Salman’s family,” an RBI official told Faking News.

Salman removing his shirt and inviting ASI to excavate his heart.

Salman removing his shirt and inviting ASI to excavate his heart.

“Realizing how foolish we had been all along to miss on such a golden opportunity, literally, we immediately called up a meeting where Raghuram Rajan sir announced the new gold reserve in the country,” the official went on to reveal.

RBI’s decision has received thumbs up from the central govt. Both RBI and govt are confident that Salman’s heart will help India in consolidating its global standing when it comes to gold reserves.

“Right now we don’t feature in the top 10 list of countries with largest gold holdings. But if we take Salman’s heart into consideration, we are confident of not alone forcing our way through it but also topping that list,” said finance minister Arun Jaitely.

In order to harness the gold, govt now intends to start excavation inside Salman’s heart.

“Salman fans and celebs also claim that he helps those in need and right now we are in extreme need of reviving the Indian economy, so we are sure the generous man that he is, he will help us in this endeavour,” hoped an ASI official preparing for the excavation.

“Who knows while we are at it, we may even find some other natural minerals and gem stones inside his body that his fans and celebs are not even aware of,” he added.

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