Monday, August 10, 2015

AAP govt to pass ‘Right to Vandalize’ bill in Delhi

New Delhi. After AAP’s lawmaker Alka Lamba claimed that she and her supporters vandalized the sweet shop as so as to take revenge for stone thrown at her, AAP govt has decided to pass ‘Right to Vandalize’ bill in Delhi.

The new act will allow people to go about vandalizing shops, public property etc, as long no lives are lost and no living being is injured.

“For safety of our MLAs and volunteers, so that they can go about vandalizing properties peacefully without any interruption, our CM Kejriwal ji has decided to fast track and pass this bill in next session of Delhi assembly,” cabinet minister and AAP MLA Satyendra Jain told Faking News.

Alka can't believe what she did will be legal soon in Delhi.

Alka can’t believe what she did will be legal soon in Delhi.

“Janlokpal Bill can wait,” he quickly added, before our reporter could even ask about the status of pending promised bills by AAP during elections.

Though initially the act would allow vandalism as an act of revenge, but in due course it would even allow vandalism without any provocation and instigation.

“Even if we don’t pass this bill, just how do you expect a lawmaker to make laws until and unless he/she breaks one to find out loopholes in the existing laws?” forever furious Ashutosh asked, justifying Chandni Chowk MLA cum legislator Alka Lamba’s act.

Meanwhile talk of this new bill has given a ray of hope to veteran vandals across the country.

“We demand acquittal of all our party members arrested for those acts of vandalism where no living being was hurt,” said MNS and Shiv Sena, presenting a rare united front, “So many buses and autos that we burnt had nobody inside them. Then why are our lawbreaker abiding leaders being singled out?”

Unconfirmed sources say lawyer of Abdul Quadir Mohammed Younus Ansari from Raza Academy, arrested for damaging Amar Jawan Jyoti at Azad Maidan few years back, too will use the law to get bail for his client.

Surprisingly BJP too welcomed this decision by AAP govt and hoped for a reprieve from judiciary for their ex MLA Vijay Jolly accused of now a legal and respectable act of just painting somebody’s nameplate.

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