Sunday, October 11, 2015

To make Modi answerable to every Indian, Apple plans to replace Siri with Modiji software in iPhone7

New Delhi: Apple India Chairman John Jobs has announced in his recent interview that Apple will soon be introducing an Indian substitute to Siri in iPhone7 and that is planned to be named as ‘Modiji’.

A screenshot of 'Modiji' software. Then and there, the software will make hour-long speeches without any request from the user

A screenshot of ‘Modiji’ software. Then and there, the software will make hour-long speeches without any request from the user

Speaking to Faking News, John said, “Our boss Tim Cook is extremely impressed by the Indian market and the drive of the customers here to flaunt iPhones to their poor co-workers at office. Adding to the excitement was the recent meeting with Indian Prime Minister. Tim was astounded by the talking abilities of Mr.Modi, or to say Modiji in Indian way.

“After Modiji left USA, Tim conducted back-to-back meeting with several Indians working in Apple both directly and via video call. Last week, he called upon me and informed that ‘an Indian Siri will be more close to heart for Indians and will double the sales of iPhone7 in this heavily populated country’,” he added.

When asked about the reason for naming the app Modiji, he said, “As I said before, Tim was impressed by Modi’s speech. Moreover, we informed Tim that, whenever something happens in India, the whole of India demands Modi to answer. It was then he decided to call upon meetings and tried to mix the demand for Modi to answer along with our necessity to touch wider Indian market. And that was how the idea for replacing Siri with ‘Modiji’ software in iPhone7 was born. The ‘ji’ was added to give an Indian touch to the software. And the software was prepared by our developers within a week span and is already shipped to us. Want to see it?”

He demonstrated the working of ‘Modiji’ software using an iPhone7 prototype. The iPhone7 screen displayed ‘Bhaiyon Behenon’. John said aloud ‘I had been stuck here in traffic for an hour, Modiji.’

The screen remained silent. He then said, “I demand an answer from you. You should not be silent”. After three seconds, the phone speaker echoed with the bright voice of Modi saying, “Bhaiyon Behenon. Delhi is struggling with traffic. We should adjust among ourselves and give way for Ambulances. Do not litter on the roads. Do not honk and disturb school children. Respect every other person on the road and keep it safe. Wear helmet. We want a ‘traffic mukt Delhi’ and for that, you should vote for BJP in the next election. Now, put your hands above and say aloud ‘Give me way’ thrice. Jai Hind!”

Not only the Apple India chairman, but several other gadget freaks and journalists tried reasoning with Modiji software in iPhone7 prototypes that were kept for testing in the press meet.

Market analysts predict that, with the introduction of Modiji-enabled iPhone, Apple can capture back the Indian Market from Samsung next year.

Next time, if you do not get water in your tap or if your husband is watching useless news debates, do not worry. Demand an answer from Modiji software in your brand new iPhone7 and it will answer.

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