Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Israeli weapons company to study Sunny Deol’s shoulder-structure to develop powerful rocket-launchers

Tel Aviv, Israel. Israel’s largest weapons manufacturing firm Docam systems has announced that they would be studying the bone-structure of Bollywood film star Sunny Deol’s shoulder to develop a series of new and much efficient rocket-launchers. Talking to media over video conferencing Docam’s senior researcher Naftali Rafaeli provided more details.

Visual that left Israelis stunned.

Visual that left Israelis stunned.

“I am a big fan of India, however I am no big fan of Bollywood, but my daughter is. She watches all Indian feature films with lot of dance and songs. I asked her one day, why you don’t watch any war films and she showed me a few clippings from a rather emotional war film called “Border”. There I saw Mr. Deol running with a rocket launcher on his shoulder, blasting tanks, lifting missiles and what not. I even came to know that each of his hands actually weighs 2.5 Kgs. The shoulders which can take such significant weight and still work efficiently are nothing but a work of art.”

“I decided there and then, he can for sure be an ideal subject of study for us to mimic mother-nature and design more natural weapons. Especially the way his shoulder is designed will give us a lot of information on how to make our rocket launchers more efficient and lethal,” Rafaeli said.

He further continued, “In past also, we have learned from basic human anatomy and designed cutting-edge weaponry. Our current B-300 rocket launcher was modified and re-modeled according to muscle structure and bone alignment of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone’s shoulders. As the saying goes mother-nature is the best designer and we are nothing but her students.”

While Sunny Deol himself has not yet commented on this news, a few Delhi based NGOs have registered strong protests against any Indian helping Israel in any way possible. One of these NGOs which reportedly claims to have worked for emancipation of slum dwellers in Delhi is now suddenly running a “Save Gaza” campaign and will submit a signatured petition to Sunny Deol to reject Israel’s demands.

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