New Delhi. Rohit Shetty, the director of hugely meaningful films like Golmaal series, Bol Bachchan, Singham, and now Chennai Express, has been asked to get the next India-Pakistan dialogue written.
“People are saying that the dialogue between Indian and Pakistan have been useless and meaningless. Well, it’s true, but we have to continue the dialogues,” Salman Khurshid, India’s Foreign Minister told Faking News.
“We were looking for an expert who could write meaningless dialogues that would still work,” Khurshid explained, “And our search ended with Rohit Shetty – a genius who can make serious business out of meaningless dialogues – exactly what we need for India-Pakistan relations.”
Rohit Shetty wasn’t available for comments. Apparently he was going through some government documents and speeches to get ideas for dialogues in his future movies.
While Khurshid refused to confirm or deny, our sources indicate that the idea was proposed by Rahul Gandhi, who had gone to see Chennai Express this morning.
“Rahul was very impressed with ideas such as bokwas dictionary, and he immediately asked Digvijay Singh to get one. Diggi Raja is currently writing such a dictionary using his own skills,” a source confirmed.
Rahul Gandhi is also reported to have liked the dialogue ‘never underestimate the power of a common man’ in the movie.
“Kya dialogue hai yaar!” he’s reported to have told fellow Youth Congress members, “Aur dialogue se yaad aaya, India-Pakistan dialogue ka kya hua?”
That’s when it was decided that India-Pakistan dialogue will be inspired from Chennai Express, because that’s what Rahul Gandhi understands wants.
Sources say that the government is confident that Rohit Shetty can help them achieve what their leaders, diplomats, and think-tanks failed to deliver.
“Rohit has all the necessary experience,” a government source told Faking News, “He has got dialogues written for characters that can be found in the UPA government – someone who has problem speaking, a strong female character, and generally dumb people – and thus he can come up with dialogues for them that will work well with the citizens.”
“If he had got a dialogue written for Antony, the Defense Minister wouldn’t have needed to do a U-turn,” the source claimed.
“Furthermore he can show tanks and cars of Pakistani army being blown up, which will further pacify the angry citizens,” the source explained why and India-Pak dialogue under Rohit Shetty could work better than those scripted by the government.
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