Mumbai: Breakups among the young crowd in the country sky rocketed after Sunday’s high octane clash between India and Australia owing to the stupendous performance by Virat Kohli.
“I was watching the match with my boyfriend at his apartment, we were so happy after India won the match and started cuddling and kissing, but all of a sudden he turned emotional and said the most dreaded words ‘It’s over’, I still can’t believe it!” a visibly disturbed college student Katrina said.
‘Match’ for a breakup
“After watching Rock Star, I was considering this a bit. But after watching Virat Kohli bat yesterday I am 200% confirmed now that men get some sort of invincible superhuman power after a breakup. It’s time to make it large!” Ranbir, Katrina’s boyfriend mentioned.
The wave was so evident that, most of the girlfriends went hiding the day after the match or seen showering extra care on their boyfriends to stop or delay the inevitable end. “Wow! it’s so amazing, my girlfriend paid the restaurant bill for the first time today and also brought me a gift!”, one happy boyfriend mentioned at R-city mall.
Few IITians at Mumbai campus seemed ecstatic that the total pool of single girls in the country is steadily rising and they have a real chance now to make their first girlfriend. “I am going to Shivji’s temple every hour to pray for another good performance by India and specially by Virat Kohli in the forthcoming semifinal match, I am sure that will tremendously change the dating landscape in Mumbai towards my favor”, a second year student was heard saying to his friend. At the same time few bespectacled nerdy girls on campus seemed genuinely worried. “I worked so hard on my looks for last two years, I even focused only on shopping designer cloths and jewelries during my summer internship at Europe last year but seems like all in vain, I have to wait indefinitely now”, said visibly upset Monika.
Few youngsters were a bit skeptical about the formula. “I think this trick works and I have seen many cases but I am not very confident. I am planing to propose a two years break-up plan to my girlfriend. If I don’t make it large, we will reconcile”, said Rohit who is working as bartender at a famous pub at Mumbai.
The start whizkid, Rahul Yadav was seen pitching his new venture ‘Breakup.com’ to the angel investor and was very exuberant that this time he will make it bigger than Housing.com. “look at the market man! there are millions and millions of non functional relationships, youngsters are languishing due to lack of courage, I will teach them how to be open, direct and to the face for a nominal cost!”, mentioned Rahul with his characteristic flamboyant over-confidence.
Meanwhile, girlfriends and wives of other India cricket team players seemed overtly scared, they have decided to make a secret WhatsApp group called “Chicken Soup for the Soul: Avoid Breakup and Divorce” to tackle the issue and share resources. Sakhsi wasn’t very keen initially, but after lot of pleading she agreed to become the group’s adviser and share her best practices which have contributed towards Capt. Cool’s dominance over the world cricket.
Far away at the sets of her upcoming movie Sultan, Anshuka Sharma seemed very confused by the barrage of emotional date and relationship requests she had received within a day after the Match. “I am perplexed, are these genuine after Virat’s “SHAME SHAME” Tweet or people are trying to take advantage of me by going for a ‘quick relationship and breakup’ to attain a superhuman and demigod status?”, she quipped.
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