Wednesday, November 4, 2015

Barack Obama cancels all his meetings for Nov 8, says “just can’t wait for Bihar election results”

Washinton DC: In an unprecedented move, Barack Obama has cancelled all his meetings for coming Sunday in light of Bihar election results.

Barrack Obama glued to the TV screen, checking the exit poll results

Barack Obama glued to the TV screen, checking the exit poll results

White House Press Secretary Josh Earnest made this announcement late yesterday evening. In the read out note, he stated, “Today India is playing important role on the world stage. Bihar elections are super crucial for the world’s largest democracy and Mr. Narendra Modi, who happens to be good friend of our President as well. Barack Obama has been amazed by the momentum that Bihar election has picked up.”

“He is now curiously waiting for Bihar election results as is the Indian media. He has invited his team of top bureaucrats and wants to track the results from the very time the counting begins on coming Sunday morning. Hence all other meetings scheduled with Mr. President for coming Sunday Nov 8 2015, stand cancelled with immediate effect,” he added.

On being asked why so much importance has been attached to an Indian state election results, spokesperson indicated that it ain’t any other ordinary election.

In fact, he in return questioned the question raiser, “How come you are so uninformed? Aren’t you tracking world’s most “credible” Indian media channels? Haven’t you seen them shouting at the top of their voice for past many weeks that Bihar election is the most happening thing in modern history”.

Surprisingly the questioner was embarrassed, which generally never happens to Indian journalists anyway.

While responding to another question on real impact of this election result, spokesperson admitted though saying, “We are trying our best to connect all the dots on so-projected ‘make or break’ Bihar elections but at this time Mr. President doesn’t want to take any chances and miss out on something which might be most stunning event during his term as President of United States.”

Meanwhile, our ‘special’ correspondent in Washington has confirmed from ‘reliable’ sources that White House has formed a committee to nail on the following points –

  • In spite of billions of dollars of investments in CIA, how world’s best intelligence agency has still not been able to understand what is so important about the Bihar elections, that it has received thousands of hours of coverage in Indian media channels.
  • Is there any opportunity for US Media houses to learn some best practices from Indian media. Until a decade back, US thought they were the world leaders in propaganda techniques but are shocked in the way we have left them behind by far, through our 100+ 24×7 Indian news channels who have amazing capability to build extreme momentum around anything and everything, however big or small, irrespective of its relevance to the majority of the citizens.

On the other hand, Amit Shah’s office confirmed after multiple attempts to reach him that Amit Shah has been invited by Prime Minister to 7 Race Course Road on Sunday morning for Chai pe Charcha.

The primary agenda is to discuss on the next petty thing that media should be kept busy with while Government can focus on solving bigger challenges for the nation.

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