Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Pattinson’s presentation recovered from dustbin, to play at Mohali

Chandigarh. In a dramatic turn of events, James Pattinson, who was axed from the Australian team for failing to make a presentation, is now set to play the third test match of the ongoing India-Australia series at Mohali after his presentation paper was found lying in a dustbin.


The paper with suggestions from Pattinson to improve Australia’s cricket team’s performance was handed over to the Australia team management today evening by Suresh, a member of the housekeeping staff of the hotel where Indian team is staying.


Pattinson

He will be back in action



“While I was cleaning the room of Shikhar Dhawan I found a crumbled paper in the dustbin. The paper had something of the sort ‘Australian spinners should get involved in sex scandals‘ written on it. I thought Shikhar has a message for Australian team so I delivered the paper to their team management, realizing later what I had done,” Suresh said.


In an emergency press conference called in the night by BCCI, captain Dhoni clarified that Shikhar Dhawan had not stolen the paper.


Reading the official statement from Shikhar Dhawan, Dhoni said, “While taking evening walk few days back, I ate bhelpuri from a roadside vendor. Accidentally the paper in which the bhelpuri was served turned out to be the presentation paper of Pattinson. I think the paper would have got into the dustbin, which was then used by the vendor to serve the bhelpuri. I regret my action.”


Later Dhoni clarified that Shikhar regretted the action of not following his parents’ advice not to eat roadside food.


When Faking News reporter asked why Shikhar didn’t give the bhelpuri paper back to Australian coach, and whether the Delhi batsman was trying to get Pattinson out of the team as the Australian pacer could prove lethal on Mohali track, Dhoni dismissed the allegation with his characteristic reply “Let’s keep things simple for now”.


While the Australian coach is supposed to be impressed with the bhelpuri presentation, many cricket experts believe that this whole chain of events was set up by the Australian team to demoralize the debutant Shikhar Dhawan.


“We have ordered an inquiry into the incident,” a BCCI source told Faking News, “This is a serious issue where a bhelpuri vendor is getting free material from cricket dressing rooms. We would make sure that we get our share of revenues.”



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