Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Parliamentary resolution against Sri Lanka will be a photo of Karunanidhi

New Delhi. Congress has found a solution to the political crisis created after DMK decided to pull out from the UPA government. The party has decided that the resolution against Sri Lanka, which will be put for adoption in the Parliament of India, will have a photo of Karunanidhi, and nothing else.


“We were struggling with what words to put in the resolution, because words like ‘genocide’ could have jeopardized our relationship with Sri Lanka, while absence of such words could have further jeopardized our relationship with DMK,” Parliamentary Affairs Minister Kamal Nath told Faking News.


Poster of Karunanidhi

DMK has been asked to provide such powerful pictures of their party chief that can be passed as a resolution against Sri Lanka



Sources inform that Congress core group, after a two hour meeting, couldn’t finalize the wordings of the resolution; let alone taking the draft resolution to alliance partners and subsequently to other political parties of India.


With time running out, the party decided to move a resolution that had no words at all in the draft.


“This is a first in any democracy across the world, and we are proud to take this step under the leadership of Madam Sonia Gandhi – a woman of strong resolve – and Dr. Manmohan Singh – a man of few words,” Kamal Nath justified the wordless resolution.


To make the resolution strong and critical of atrocities by Sri Lankan army on Tamils, a high resolution picture of Karunanidhi will be used.


“The picture would be of at least of 18 megapixels clarity, one megapixel for every DMK Lok Sabha MP,” a source claimed. After Faking News asked for further clarification, the source rejected that ‘megapixel’ was a code word for something like ‘crore rupees’.


“This should make DMK happy and we hope that they will come back to the UPA,” Kamal Nath hoped.


Since the resolution will have no words, and hence nothing to debate upon, Congress expects the Parliament to pass it after a walkout by the AIADMK and a couple of hours of disruptions by other parties where they might object to colors used in the picture.


“You know, something like proportion of colors lie saffron, green, red, blue, etc. in the picture,” Kamal Nath explained, “We are open to feedbacks and suggestions by the parties and make some amendments to the resolution accordingly.”



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