Friday, April 8, 2016

Shocking study reveals that pressing buttons repeatedly doesn’t make the lift go faster

New Delhi: In a shocking incident, researchers at IIT-Delhi have concluded that pressing the buttons repeatedly doesn’t make the lift go any faster. This study has surprised everyone around the world as it was long believed that the lift accelerates every time you press the buttons to call a lift.

Lift

Pressing them again and again is just a waste of energy

Researchers have published this report stating that pressing the call buttons once is enough and any attempt to move the lift faster will be like Shatrughan Sinha’s attempts to get fired from BJP, futile.

Faking News correspondent interacted with many regular lift users and most of them seemed in a state of shock after this study.

“This is really surprising. I have been moving up and down in lifts for the past 30 years and I thought I have saved countless hours by moving the lift quickly towards me. Now they tell me this is a lie? Am I to believe that all this while, I was just looking like an idiot pressing a button repeatedly without any meaningful gains? No, no, I don’t trust these IIT guys, I will wait for a Harvard study on this”, said 55 yrs old Mr. Ajay Bardhan.

Some people were not too bothered about this discovery and said that they will keep pressing the buttons regardless. “Who cares if the lift moves faster or not? It just gives me something to do while I wait for the lift in our 50 storey office tower so I will keep spending my time pressing those buttons”, said Ajay Singh.

Meanwhile, an editor at a magazine has asked scientists whether it is possible to slow down the lift if he is alone in the lift with a subordinate. The researchers advised the concerned editor to wait for the verdict of his case instead of waiting for the findings of any such research.

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